I kept quiet about this one because I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to discuss on socials, but it seems like I could have hyped it up a bit more!

On Tuesday 6th August, I attended the Del Rey summer party in London Bridge. It was an invite-only event and attended by all sorts of book people: Waterstones booksellers, influencers, journalists, the audiobook team from Spotify, agents, editors, and book box companies- Illumicrate and Goldsboro specifically. At first I didn’t take the time to appreciate how big a deal this was, but on the day, I got incredibly nervous, because I knew I was going to have to speak on an author panel.

As soon as I walked into the venue, with all the dim lights, music, and fancy decor, my mouth dried up. I was scared to talk to people. Then I saw a long table of proofs - and there, bound in its own cover, was THE REAPER, its first time out in public. My book was joined by others: Lev Grossman’s The Bright Sword, L. K. Steven’s Silvercloak, Ava Reid’s Lady Macbeth, Danielle L. Jensen’s A Fate Inked in Blood, and fellow debut Nadia El-Fassi’s Best Hex Ever. All the other authors were brilliant, and they had a solid social media presence. I decided to avoid the crowds and went up to the balcony for a breather. I watched as influencers and guests gravitated to the other books, popped them into their tote bags, and promptly ignored THE REAPER. Oh dear, I thought: is this what’s to come? Will all my hopes for this book end up in tatters before we’ve had a chance to launch it? I texted my husband in a panic. Don’t worry, he said: no one knows you yet.

I started talking to my fellow authors, kindly introduced to me by some members of team Del Rey. Still nervous, I ordered a coke and mingled, felt very awkward as I tried to wrack up conversation with the influencers. Oh god, I thought: if I don’t draw them in, none of them will pick my book from the table. They might even write me a bad review.

At last, we were announced for the panel, and my heart lurched into my throat as I went up to the stage. Sam Bradbury asked us questions we were already sent via email a few days before. First question was simple: what is your book about? This was the big moment. If I was too brief in my answer, no one would be interested, if I said too much, I ran the risk of spoiling important plot points. I had practised at home, on the train, walking up to the venue, but once the mic was in my hands I drew a bit of a blank. I started speaking and it sounded like nonsense in my ears. When I looked out at the audience, however, they appeared … impressed?

The second question was about the allure of hidden magic. I remember my answer for this one because it was less garbled. I spoke about the allure and tension that secrets allow in narratives, and how keeping the magic secret raises the question of consequences if the magic is found out. I also spoke about how, as my cast is mainly Black, the characters have to navigate a modern London in which Black people are more likely to be stopped by the police, so an additional social commentary comes into play in how they have choose to hide the magic paraphernalia that carry on their person. I added on that it allows me to play with class, too, as we all know conspiracy theories about what powerful people are doing behind the scenes, and in the world of GETHSEMANE, they really are up to no good, and they’re using their supernatural practices to kill each other off.

Soon afterwards, the panel ended and we rejoined the crowds. I looked over at the table and THE REAPER was gone, just like that. Guests approached me and asked me to sign their copies. Out of nowhere, people kept approaching me to learn more about the story because they were so excited by the premise. The Waterstones staff was particularly enthusiastic. I met quite a few, and one said he really hopes my book does well because he loved the concept so much. The biggest thrill of the night was when I was told by team Del Rey that a journalist from Cosmopolitan specifically asked for a copy of THE REAPER immediately after I gave my pitch. The whole night was thrilling. I got myself another drink and finally relaxed. Oh wow, I thought: maybe this book stuff ain’t to bad after all!

Publishing is an opaque, exclusive industry, one that feels so insular if you’re just getting started in it. I entered the party as a total outsider, nervous and feeling inadequate, and went home absolutely exhilarated. My agent, Molly, gave me a big hug afterwards. I then saw photos of THE REAPER on social media as all the bookstagrammers started posting their arc hauls. My book is officially out there with early readers, and I’m not overcome with dread. What a night! I’m starting to feel like an author now, and I’m allowing myself to get excited for the year ahead.